ayien.
Weirdly wired, wiredly weird.
I am, ur favourite nurse.
Where is the fire in your eyes?
Do you remember all the things we used to share?
Your strong words gave hope to me so many times
But now theres only silence when we meet
These are the darkest of your days, where are your thousand friends?
And who will guide you through the nights as all the lights went out?
In the darkness of your room, the only time that you feel free
The solidarity you feel is only solitude you share
This is where they want you to be
Wasting all your thoughts and passion
The solidarity you feel is only solitude you share
Your strong words gave hope to me so many times
But now theres only silence when we meet
- mybestfriends.com (Heaven Shall Burn)
who ever said it was all about the useless screaming and vicious headbanging and horrible music? so much for perfection thru silence. it never works. haaa. and somehow i feel good inside right now. nevermind the crappy tummyache right after sahur, or the never-ending trips to and from the toilet, or even the freaky dreams wid shag, the bf, fit and many other people in it. it sure as hell took me alotta guts to send that msg ouhkehh, otherwise why wud it haf stayed in the archive for days? alaarrs. u noe lahs, i aint exactly an expressive kinda person.and it made me laugh when her reply started wid a "wats wif all the emo so early in the morning?" i guess she just needed sum time to grasp wid reality, and im pretty proud my dear old friend is keeping the strong front. people make mistakes, its just a matter of how u redeem it. and its nice to noe he's lending her his back for support altho the current's rather strong. it makes me ashamed to noe that i hadnt been doing the same. but we made it a point to meet up before raya, and when the time comes.. i hope she'd be all ready. it doesnt realy matter if she tells or not. afterall, its her story to keep. and if she chooses to not share it wid her besfren here, it doesnt make a difference.
and the more i thought about it, i just realised something. perhaps the only reason i had that lil tense moment wid the bf last week was because i hadnt exactly got anyone else to share my stories wid. and it certainly hadnt helped that he was juggling between two jobs, friends, family and myself. on one side he's trynna kip it all under control and on the other side, im demanding attention. haaaaahaaaaa. ouh c'mon, which gf doesnt do that? but its never too good to provoke the hulk in a person cus the result is rather disastrous. majiam rampage gituks. haiyaaa. cant really blame me. bro's too busy wid his o-levels stuffs, and the other frens are too busy wid their own personal business. thankgawd ive still got one lucky stick. phewws.
the hols bin fine so far. nuthink much up tho, watched coupla dvds.
aiyaaaiiis! for thoose who hadnt caught V For Vendetta yet, go catch it maynnn! *two thumbs up* im gonna watch it again later, after syz's done wid watching Aquamarine. reaaaaaaalllii. pergi tengok, tak rugi i promise! but of cus, its rather incomprehensible for some. but its ouhkeh, u can always pause it and think over it (like i did) or rewind it. hahahaha. i personally love that part when he just rattled on this very long sentence wid practically every word that starts wid a 'V', and it seemed so easy like as if he's been saying it since forever. wa betul2 salute sama itu director larrs. go on, flick ur dictionary under the 'V' section and count how many words u actually noe. huahuahua.
i just realised that i hadnt exactly been composing in malay for quite some time now. and i bet my malay wud be getting worst. i attempted to write a short paragraph describing the scene from outside my window wid all those subtle phrase. and it aint as impressive as it had been. ouh god jelly. so much for being an A1 malay student back then. wahahah. decay thru disuse.
ouhkehhh. i think imma end tis one. its getting mighty long alreadi. woooo! am gonna break fast wid the atachment friends today. taaas!
ain-